Haunted Identities: Neuropsychological and Clinical Perspectives on Persistent Intrusion, Mimetic Identity Disturbance, and Partner Re-Creation in Cluster B Personality Disorders

Abstract

Individuals with Cluster B personality disorders—including Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD), and Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD)—are overrepresented among stalkers and harassers of former partners. A subset of these individuals not only persist in intrusive behaviors but also engage in mimetic identity disturbance: adopting the style, appearance, and behaviors of their ex-partner’s new romantic interest. Beyond this, some attempt to reshape their new romantic partner into a facsimile of their ex, recreating lost dynamics. These behaviors reflect profound identity diffusion, unstable attachment, and neurobiological dysregulation in frontolimbic, dopaminergic, and mirror-neuron systems. Victims of such dynamics often experience trauma, identity violation, and boundary collapse. This paper integrates neuroscience, clinical psychology, and forensic evidence to analyze the dual dynamics of mimicry and partner re-creation, and outlines therapeutic and legal responses.

1. Introduction

The aftermath of romantic dissolution in Cluster B personality disorders is marked by emotional dysregulation, impulsivity, and attachment dysfunction. While stalking and harassment are well documented, less attention has been paid to mimetic identity disturbance, where the former partner imitates the ex’s new romantic partner. Further still, when engaging in a new relationship, these individuals may attempt to transform their new partner into a replica of the ex, taking them to the same restaurants, vacations, and social venues; encouraging them to adopt similar clothing or habits; or even contacting the ex under the pretext of needing help.

Such behaviors expose two interlinked dynamics:

Self-transformation toward the rival (new romantic partner of the ex).
Other-transformation of the new partner into the ex.

Both reflect unstable self-concept, impaired identity boundaries, and compulsive relational repetition rooted in Cluster B pathology.

2. Diagnosed Cluster B Disorders and Post-Relationship Intrusion

Prevalence: Approximately half of stalkers in forensic psychiatric samples are diagnosed with a personality disorder, most often Cluster B or mixed Cluster B traits (Douglas & Dutton, 2001).
BPD: Diagnosed cases exhibit pronounced fear of abandonment, identity diffusion, and recurrent relational instability, which may manifest as harassment and mimicry (Sansone, 2010).
NPD: Entitlement and hypersensitivity to rejection drive retaliatory behaviors, often fueled by envy of the new partner.
HPD: Attention-seeking and identity malleability predispose individuals to overt mimicry of rivals.
ASPD: While less focused on identity mimicry, antisocial traits contribute to boundary violation, coercive tactics, and deceptive contact attempts.

3. Mimetic Identity Disturbance: Self-Transformation Toward the Rival

Behaviors include:

Adopting hairstyles, clothing, or tattoos identical to the new partner.
Copying hobbies, music, or dietary habits.
Frequenting the same cafés, gyms, or workplaces to engineer “chance encounters.”
Social media mimicry—replicating posts, captions, or aesthetic presentation.
Personality adaptation, becoming “spiritual,” “outdoorsy,” or “intellectual” to mirror the rival’s traits.

These mimicry behaviors represent role absorption in DSM-5 terms, and align with findings on identity diffusion in BPD and HPD.

4. Partner Re-Creation: Transforming the New Romantic Partner into the Ex.

Another striking phenomenon occurs when identity-disturbed individuals enter new relationships: they attempt to reshape the new partner into a surrogate ex.

Concrete examples include:

Environmental scripting: Bringing the new partner to restaurants, bars, or vacation spots once shared with the ex.
Stylistic molding: Encouraging the new partner to wear clothing, hairstyles, or accessories reminiscent of the ex.
Behavioral shaping: Subtly or overtly influencing speech, hobbies, or social behaviors to align with the ex.
Shared ritual duplication: Repeating anniversary trips, shared playlists, or domestic routines identical to those with the ex.
Proxy information-seeking: Contacting mutual acquaintances—or even the ex themselves—under guises of needing help, advice, or “closure.”

From a psychological perspective, this represents an effort to rebuild the lost object relationship, where the ex is internalized and recreated externally. The new partner often remains oblivious, interpreting such behaviors as idiosyncratic preferences rather than reenactments.

5. Neuroscientific Underpinnings

5.1 Amygdala and Threat Sensitivity

BPD individuals show hyperactive amygdala responses to social rejection (Buchheim et al., 2016). Mimicry reduces threat signals by symbolically closing distance with the rival.

5.2 Prefrontal Cortex Deficits

Impaired regulation in the medial prefrontal cortex and ACC contributes to impulsivity and poor inhibition of intrusive behaviors (Geurts et al., 2022).

5.3 Dopaminergic Reward Circuits

Persistent stalking and mimicry parallel addictive persistence, as dopaminergic circuits maintain salience of the ex-partner and rival (Marazziti, 2015). Partner re-creation produces reward by recreating the lost bond.

5.4 Serotonin and Impulse Control

Low serotonin impairs inhibition, facilitating compulsive pursuit and inappropriate contact (Meloy, 2005).

5.5 Mirror Neurons and Imitation

Overactivation of mirror neuron networks may drive compulsive imitation of rivals’ style and behaviors, extending mimicry beyond normal social adaptation into pathological identity appropriation.

5.6 Default Mode Network (DMN) and Self-Concept

DMN instability in BPD reflects fragmented self-referential processing, predisposing individuals to borrow identity from others—whether rivals or ex-partners—leading to mimicry and partner re-creation.

6. Psychological Frameworks

Attachment Theory: Disorganized attachment drives both mimicry (fusion with rival) and partner re-creation (rebuilding the lost attachment figure).
Object Relations: Failure to integrate good/bad object representations leads to attempts to restore the “good” ex-object through substitution in a new partner.
Obsessive Relational Intrusion (ORI): Both mimicry and partner re-creation serve as symbolic ORI strategies to maintain psychological closeness despite separation.
Identity Diffusion: The stalker lacks a stable self, instead fusing self with rival and coercing new partner into ex’s image to stabilize identity externally.

7. Victim Impact

Identity Violation: Victims experience intrusion not only into their lives but into their very sense of uniqueness, as ex-partners copy or re-create aspects of their relationships.
Social Confusion: Friends and acquaintances may misinterpret mimicry or contact attempts as benign rather than coercive.
Trauma and Boundary Collapse: Victims often report hypervigilance, helplessness, and destabilization of social trust (Storey, 2023).

8. Therapeutic and Forensic Implications

For Diagnosed Individuals

DBT and MBT: Improve emotional regulation and reflective capacity, potentially reducing mimicry and coercive partner reshaping.
TFP: Targets identity diffusion, helping individuals integrate fragmented self-states.

For Victims

Trauma Therapy: Restore boundary integrity and counteract identity destabilization.
Safety Planning: Legal protections, digital monitoring, and psychoeducation.
Awareness Raising: Victims and their networks benefit from understanding that mimicry and partner re-creation are pathological, not flattering or coincidental.

9. Conclusion

Formally diagnosed individuals with Cluster B disorders frequently engage in post-breakup stalking and harassment. In extreme cases, this expands into mimetic identity disturbance (self-transformation toward the rival) and partner re-creation (shaping a new partner into the ex). These behaviors stem from identity diffusion, attachment pathology, and frontolimbic neurobiological dysfunction. For victims, the impact is uniquely destabilizing, blending harassment with identity violation. Treatment requires integrative psychotherapeutic and forensic strategies, grounded in neuroscience and trauma-informed care.

References

Buchheim, A., et al. (2016). Neural correlates of attachment and emotion regulation in BPD. Frontiers in Human Neuroscience.
Douglas, K. S., & Dutton, D. G. (2001). Assessing the link between stalking and personality disorders. Aggression and Violent Behavior, 6(5–6), 519–546.
Geurts, D. E. M., et al. (2022). Amygdala response predicts clinical symptom reduction in BPD. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience.
Marazziti, D. (2015). Stalking: a neurobiological perspective. Rivista di Psichiatria.
Meloy, J. R. (2005). Some thoughts on the neurobiology of stalking. Journal of Forensic Sciences.
Sansone, R. A. (2010). Fatal attraction syndrome: Stalking behavior and borderline personality. Innovations in Clinical Neuroscience, 7(2), 12–15.
Storey, J. E. (2023). The impact of stalking and its predictors. Journal of Interpersonal Violence.